now understand please, that i'm not one of these people who goes out and gets the tattoo du jour in order to appear edgy and vaguely counterculture, nor do i go all out and sleeve every limb on my body. no dolphins circling yin-yangs or fucking butterflies on my lower back or ankles. i have just a few that i think are meaningful to me and weren't picked out of a goddam flash book while i was drunk. simple reminders of things for nobody else but me.

but my mom's on this thing, she says, "those are going to look so stupid when you get older. you'll look ridiculous, you know that?"

you know what, mom? everybody looks stupid when they get older. some faded, warped tattoos really aren't going to make a difference when i'm hunched over a cane, toothless and muttering about the naked martians in the wastebasket.

so semper goddam fi. have some fun, why don't you?