* strangely, the backstreet boys don't have their own action figures. i think maybe it's because everybody found out that one guy drinks beer, or something. thanks, asshole, you've wrecked it for everybody.

* grand theft auto III, the ps2 game that's all the rage, is not to be sold to anybody under seventeen. nobody over seventeen has ever come in and bought one.

* when kids are rude and obnoxious to me for no good reason, i like to tell them that i hope they're happy now that they've ruined christmas.

* you've worked at the mall too long when you know which places in the food court give you the biggest soda for the least money.

* people who don't work here think that this is a fun job. what, do you think we get to play with the toys all day? no, we chase seven year olds stealing pokemon and clean up baby urine.

even a punk needs a paycheck.

even a punk needs a paycheck.